Bothered #sunnyonfeminism


The beginning
It seems like, this talking has popped up out of the dark only a couple months ago: Everyone speaks of gender equality. Like there was an agenda of thing humanity yet needs to take care of, and this issue no stands up front.
I sorted out the situation for you: Men and women are apparently nowhere close to be equal. The women who feel the need to say that every single day of their lives, are called feminists. The guys that are helping in that matter are called responsible. Because, women’s issues are everyone’s issues. Bringing attention to this problematic seems to be the most important task on a rather short plan of action, but for me it just feels like throwing a hazelnut into Lake Michigan. Maybe not a bad start, but far away of making a change at all.

On March 7th, World Woman’s Day, I decided to add this section to my blog. I’ve been looking for input regarded this subject ever since and to start I picked the following subject: Sexual harassment.
The results were crashing. I will not get much into complaining about how unfair this world is treating my gender, but in this case I need to say, that the truth will speak for itself and that there is just no way of bringing some kind of positivity into this article.
A couple months ago I read an article of the exact same subject in a magazine called NEON, I believe. One sentence of this one pager sticks in my head until this day: “The research went horribly fast.”
It seemed like this reporter just needed to go up and down the hallway for half an hour and she had collected enough women to write her text. These where women that where bothered in clubs, harassed on the street or have been taken advantage of even by good friends after a night of heavy drinking. The reactions centered somewhere between: “Well, if besides nothing happened”, or “I’m sure it wasn’t meant to go that way” or the classical “Shit happens” attitude. Because “Only someone grabbed you ass in a club doesn’t mean you’ve been sexually harassed.” Well, actually yes. It does.

About every second women over the age of 15 has been sexually harassed before in the EU. If this is a fact, there’s not much that can be added to the truth itself. But, the thing that really makes me angry, is the whole reaction to this issue. The “Oh, well”-look, the “Don’t make a fuss” opinions.
Here’s from my experience. I like to party. One night, to different clubs in a big city. This one guy, came up from behind me and just put his hand all over my cleavage. When you’re about to say something, I promise you – you will look in this exact face: “Shit, sorry I’m just super drunk, wasn’t on purpose.”
Oh sure, no biggie, just broke the law all accidently. Happens.
See, this isn’t about this guy in the club. He was probably just college guy who went out with his mates, being just a normal ´, drunk guy. This is about the misconception about what is normal and what is not. Because, apparently some have lost track of where the line goes, if everyone keeps saying “Oh, no big deal, it happenes, all good.”
Dancing, wearing a loose shirt, being young, female and single, all this is not a reason for anyone to accidently touch you, where ever. Also, it doesn’t entitle anyone to act like it’s no big deal, if it does happen. Partying is a sensible situation, everyone is having fun, but human are human. This is where “fun” ends.
A couple more serious words, a couple less drunken college guys and who knows – maybe a year from today it’ll only be every third women. A small step, but a step.

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